I did notice this morning that my love handles are going away. I still have a nice paunch of skin in the front of my stomach, but on the sides, it's firming up. Those sit-ups must be paying off. Normally when I go on WW, my whole middle shrinks, but everything starts hanging even more and feeling less firm. I always wonder how on the Biggest Loser, people start off so big, finish so small, and don't have much hanging skin at the end. It must be because they work out. I'm glad I'm working out. Granted I'm starting to hate it, but it's making me feel much better about myself.
I think people who work out are more confident... I know I am. I also don't feel embarrassed to go out in public anymore. It's like I'm thinking in my head, "yah, I'm fat, but not for long". Let me rephrase... I wasn't embarrassed to go out in public, I was just embarrassed to be out in public for the chance that I'd run into someone I knew in the past and they'd think "wow, she really let herself go". I also always felt like people were always looking at me thinking "what a fatty", but seriously... how arrogant is that? I'm just a person in the crowd. Not everyone is always looking at me. I know I don't scrutinize everyone I see and make comments to myself about them. They are just people, people whom I don't know and probably never will.
Now if I could just do something about my neck. I really focused yesterday while doing the Shred to try to use just my ab muscles for the sit-ups/crunches. I think I was using too many neck muscles at the same time before. My mother-in-law pointed out to me last night (when I was complaining about my new thick neck) that neck muscles help improve posture. So I will learn to love my new neck, and just keep my fingers crossed that it doesn't get too much bigger. I picture those body builders who's heads look really small because their necks are so big. Eyeyeye...
I'm in the middle of a debate with myself. Yesterday was the first night that I didn't workout because I'd done it earlier in the day. One one hand, I was happy that it was already over and done with, but on the other hand, since I didn't have to workout, I wanted to eat. I ended up going not just two points over (like in my journal) but four points over. I had a Special K bar after I had already posted my journal. I finally went to bed because I didn't want to keep eating. So I'm debating on weather or not I want to workout in the morning or in the evening. Last night, and evening workout would have been horrible. With the power going out, our house was without AC for a couple hours, so it was pretty warm. I wouldn't have wanted to workout in the heat. Hmmm.. I think I'll try another morning workout and see how it goes.
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